Just So Tired Of It All

[weredIgo]

Hi,
If it was simply that easy. I notice myself feeling more and more we are spinning our wheels these days. Just so tired of it all. This "THING" makes you feel stuck , stuck in a never ending nightmare. I can't think of another disease except how AIDS was that has this isolating aura about it. Did you ever have a gut feeling? Haven't we all at one time or another said you should listen to those gut feelings. Well we are constantly being told, in one way or another our thoughs and gut feelings are wrong. As an example, before I even knew what I had or went to any web sites, I started baging up my clothes. Then when my son called one day and said watch the news, there is a story of someone describing the same sympoms as you Mom. Funny but when I did read all about this every one basically was doing the same things. Instinct. What I'm trying to say is we are all soooo tired of this and yet we can't stop searching because we are RIGHT. They can tell us till the cows come home that we are wrong or crazy and we will not stop. They have adopted the wrong long term treatment for this disorder. Tell them they are DOP and put them on crazy meds that will put them in a state of incoherence. That way they won't care what is happening to them, and leave us alone and not cost any money. We are not wrong, and all this theory has done is make us more determined to prove them wrong.Because no one with a dr in front of their name will confirm this for us we doubt ourselves. They know this. Listen to your instincts. Your feeling what your feeling and you are SEEING what you are seeing.
When I was a child we lived next door to people that did not keep up their home (and that is being polite about it). It was instilled in me at very young age, pride in self and home. I was always fussy about my home and my appperance. I have been in a sense pretty sheltered my adult life by being married since 18. Didn't ever have much of a social life. It was pretty much about home and family. I had never been exposed to anyone that might be suceptable to this type of disease. I had no idea about such as this. If I could come up with this anyone could. I also feel there is a judgement that comes with this disease too. This is how I feel it steals your soul. There is a shame that goes along with this too that can definitely get you down. We all some how have to hold our heads up to keep our dignity intact through this. It is hard though. This is the biggest,bitterest life lession pill I've ever had to swallow. I'm sure its the same for all of you too. I feel this is a pretty sharp group of people here. OK, we are not scientists but sharp none the less. This affiction does not fit. Its just one more piece of the puzzle I think about.
Anyhoooo, I soooo understand how you can be "Just so tired of it all".


Claudia

[Sadsack]

Claudia -

I related to so many things you said.
First, almost as soon as I read about this condition, I thought - "everyone's got this...has to be". Well, I don't know if everyone does, but I think the number of people who have "early stages" of this is staggering. Yes - if I can get it, anyone can.
And yes, it's a soul-stealer. There is a "hole" in my spirit as big as the sky. It can't be described to people who don't experience it. It's like the walking dead.

SS

[Baraka Obam]

Mens attitude towards danger is quite normal, I would think, the people that for a million years went out every day faceing saber toothed tigers and other such monsters. What did a woman want for the first million years a man that would run after that saber tooth tiger with dinner on his mind and no fear. It seems today woman want hairless boys that are all sissyfied, no room for real men. They actually have men shaving their bodys, holy cow. When the muggers break into the house sissy boy will be the first one out the window. You girls should be proud you still have a real ignorant hairy caveman instead of someone that sits down with you and crys because he has a pimple and his stockings have holes in them!!! Just remember all the things they can be coaxed to do for you, clean snow off your car, fix the house, car or lug home all the new furniture and arrage it to your tastes. Do you think the hairless crying sensative, lady boy will do all that, hell no. There is one good thing about this new creature, he will not run off with your G/F, most likely he will be with the 16 year old hairless boy next door. Each one of us that faces this, although not exactly alone has been shown just how ugly the world can be, it isn't fair, some will say. I say, we actually have one real good person to lean on, that person is us, if you give up, you are done, if you harbor all kinds of negative ideas you are done and it is not anyones else problem, IT IS YOUR PROBLEM. If you give on life it will give up on you. Be strong for yourselves and do not EXPECT help from anyone, they can not feel your pain.

You get what you pay for.

[posey]

If at the times when I am feeling really down, I want you all to know I am so very sorry if I cause anyone to feel worse. I certainly don't mean to.

This is a lifeline to me, to be able to have a place to go where people REALLY do care and understand. If I helped anyone by knowing they are not alone and their own feelings are validated, well I guess in a way that helps. Although I am vey sorry ALL of you suffer from this also, I know it helps me to know that tha I am not alone in this craziness. I truly wish I could be near all of you, shed a tear and give everyone a big hug.

I love you all as fellow human beings and especially in this trial/tribulation we are sharing together. I do not know what I would do without you. Even though I do not know everyone here personally, you all have a place in my heart.

I am thankful to God for having our paths cross, even though it is via such a horrific thing. For otherwise I would not know YOU people of this world who have hearts just as big as the world itself is.

I know we are all from different backgrounds and so forth, but when it comes right down to humanity and our fellow humans, we are here for each other. This is what truly matters.

This is how the whole world should be. What a wonderful place it would be if all the countries and the whole world could create a message board such as this. Let each one speak kindly, have their say and respect each other with out offening and forget the nasty POWER and MONEY objectives.

We arw not defined by what we have or do not have, be it looks, money,power or whatever. It's in the heart where one is defined and I see a lot of defining here which I love.

posey

[jade]

Hi Posey
I know how you feel. I have had this infection for 6 years and am quite tired.
I do lots of yoga (easy classes Kripalu and Hatha) this helps your immune system and your energy. A naturopath has helped me alot. I take 4-5000mg Ester-C each day. This helps with energy. Also lots of garlic capsules (New Chapter Garlicforce is my favourite) and have recently started taking Black Walnut Combination by Genestra which is helping get rid of some of the lesions. Salt baths. I do minimal cleaning and take lots of breaks.
There are many things you can try. Meditation books are great such as those by Louise Hayes, Eckhart Tolle. How about finding a good naturopath in your area? Hang in there, you are not alone. Together we can get find a cure.

Hugs, Jade