life sucks...

[jonsi]

my dad fell and hit his eye on the table, now blind in that eye. My daughter's Godfather died on Wednesday 12/7 and I do NOT want to have to go to the Rosary thing before his Mass...

My boyfriend & I "broke" up...

What else? Gator is sick, and my best friends son is in ICU with his intestines/gut opened up because of pancreatitus..

Thanks for letting me vent.

itwl,
~jonsi

[dizzy dame]

jonsi, sometimes life does suck, that is the way of things. I am so sorry you are feeling sad and bad. Just wanted to give you a cyber hug and hope things improve fast! (we need better hug smilies). DD

[jonsi]

Thank you dizzy... thank you so much. I feel like my "M" family here is closer to me than my physical family sometimes. I'm pouring out tears.

Itwl,
~jonsi

[janedoe]

aww man, im sorry , it hits you all at once though, dont it? you'll get through this. 'this too, shall pass'...hang in there

[mrsvigors]

Hi everyone

Well I have officially been awake for 36 hours, freaking out And having panic attacks whilst constantly picking things out of my nose and eyes! I have been using a saline nasal spray for a few days and the worms in my nose seemed to have lost their grip so I started pulling them out and then I couldn't stop...as after the worms had more or less been eradicated, black spikes were shooting out of my nostrils and gripping into anywhere they could reach, my eyes, ears face, inside of my nostrils, hair, clothes! They just kept coming so aggressively and I couldn't stop them with anything I usually use so I just had to keep on trying to grab them! I thought I was really making progress as at one point I was also pulling out tiny comma shaped specs and then a big ball of mucus, so I then thought I should keep going to see if I could destroy this thing at the root (it all started in my nose)


I cannot believe that after 24 hours of pulling there was just no end in sight, just millions of ongoing clear crystal like fibres, more worms and the continuing spike avalanche. I decided to try a salt and peroxide bath with Epsom salts and 35% Hydrogen peroxide which eased everything all the time I was in the water. As soon as I got out and got dressed, I was back to square one! Nose was full again,sinus's and nose looked fat and my hair was alive.

Decided then after 33 hours to try and get some sleep despite a racing heart and creeping scalp. It was dark when I got into bed and as soon as i turned off the light, I swear I could see small creatures appearing over EVERYTHING including me, like something from a horror movie. They appeared to sort of glisten as they moved and they moved like insects with loads of legs, definitely black as they made things darker as they got closer.

Please tell me...Sleep deprivation or was this real? If it was real then my entire house is completely and utterly infested beyond help, therefore I must be absolutely riddled beyond a bit of saline spray!

Needless to say I made a fast exit from the bedroom and just sat smoking in my kitchen and applying copious amounts of Vaseline/sudocreme/saline solution to my face. I feel like my life is not worth living. My suspicion that my son is also infected is now more or less confirmed, as it's impossible for him not to be in this house with his constant putting things in his mouth.

Am I fighting a losing battle? Am I doing the right thing by trying to extract these creatures from my nose manually? Do these things just come and get you in your sleep anyway? I just don't know anymore. I've just returned to work after a year of sickness and don't see how I'm going to leave the house tomorrow, let alone function!

I'm living a life in my kitchen, too afraid to touch my little boy or prepare his food, his dad does everything. My marriage is a constant argument about time spent treating myself/paranoia of symptoms and my friends all blame my drug history and just don't get it. I live in constant fear of being touched and touching anyone, even sitting next to somebody on the train has me in bits.

I would give anything to be me again. Dear Santa, all I want for Xmas this year is my life back. Even somebody else's life would do. Dear God, please don't inflict this evil entity on my baby boy. As torturous as it is already, I would rather you give me double the amount of Morgellons than see my baby battle this too.

That is all

Crying now, stupid disease.

[janedoe]

dear santa.... yeah i wish

[absurdlyhaywired]

Oh jonsi and msvigors So sorry I think we've all had many nights just like that. You might be all ready to

go out and just want to check in the mirror or see what's that itching on

your arm and it turns into 36 hours of intense occupation. Dag.

And the rest of the bad news? When it rains it pours. I'm not sure how much

I believe this is stress related. I really don't think it is after it's

established. But I sure have heard so many stories where EVERYTHING and more

just explodes wrongly all at once in peoples lives at the same time we're

trying to deal with this. It's not right.

Just know it will pass. Maybe you'd want to try something from the vitamin

store-something for relaxation like kava kava............unless you can get

something stronger. Hang in there-We're with you

[jonsi]

Maybe if the Cowboys win and Denver loses I might feel better And it looks like Denver might win, oh well, it's only a game!

mrsvigors, hope you get through this stage of "M" really fast. It sucks, but it will pass.

Thanks you guys!

itwl,
~jonsi