Hello everyone, my name is Monika, and I have Morgellons..this is my story

[ModestoMorgie]

My life as I knew it ended 3 years ago in July...my Boyfriend and I were in my bedroom on the computer, when all of a sudden we started getting what felt like bug bites, everytime i felt the bite, I'd slap at it and smash a baby spider...after awhile of this we looked up and saw hundreds of baby spiders coming down like little paratroopers on their little web strands from the ceiling!! OMG! I freaked...my Boyfriends killed them all and cleaned it up...my hero!...About a week later, I had just came back from picking up a pizza and I had driven my old Mercedes which sometimes was also home to a few spiders now and then...I started to feel biting on my head...1 here another there all over my head ...it felt like like my head was on fire and it stung ...I freaked out thinking that a spiders egg must have hatched on my head ....i got in the shower ripping my hands thru my hair trying to get them out but I never saw any spiders...what i did see was a few spider -like things but they had a round body and like 6 long legs but they stuck out straight in front of their bodies..like jellyfish shaped....Anyway ...the days that followed I would feel biting on my scalp...and crawiing and no one could see any bugs...but my B.F. shined a flashlight on my head one night and said he saw little red and blue green fibers on my hair and what looked like water droplets...weird...skip ahead about two days later...I'm alone at home and going to bathroom, I start to feel tremendous pressure and a little pain in my arm like something pushing its way thru my vein...I look and i see about 4 inch dark line under my skin..and it is moving its way up my arm!!! it felt like and looked like a worm traveling up my vein!! I was using crystal Meth at the time...and I had hallucinated before, but this had to be the worst trip i had ever had!! I freaked out so hard I thought I was going to die from fright..I just remember getting into bath and as felt the wriggling sensation and this pressure in my big toe as if this "worm" was trying to bust out of there, I remember screaming but no sound came out , and begging for it to stop and i would never do meth again ....horrible...later on i felt something string itself straight up my spine and hook into the top of my neck and for the rest of the night i had pains encircilng my heart...I thought i was going to die that night but i didnt...I had a few other terrifying times where I thought that I was either going to die from fright or go crazy from it...but I never did...I had the electric hairs and the crumbs and specks and had a tug a war with a tissue paper worm that I yanked out of my head with tweezers...i thought was going to die from fright then too..but I mustered up all the courage i had and yanked and it looked like a white worm !! i showed my B.F. who thought i was losing my mind and imagining all of this and he would'nt look at it ...later he looked and said it was just a piece of toilet paper..it had dried out and that is exactly what it looked like...i could not understand what in the hell was happening to me....I cut my hair off one day because i thought it would give me relief of the moving stinging hairs ...it didnt...3 years and many different symptoms later I still dont understand what happened to me...but i have learned to cope for the most part...I never went crazy, all though sometimes the morgie activity drives me out of my gourd..and i wish I could go back to normal ...but that seems so far away now....I pray that this is not killing me because i need to be here for my 2 children, this has taken it s toll on them as well...they already lost their mother in a way....the one they knew before this....anyway..there is so much more to this story but it would take up so much space to write the whole thing down...anyway..glad to be here look forward to getting to know all of you...

[ladycolorado]

well, i know with meth use can hallucinate, and many of us get dop from this phenonama with morgellons disease who do not use it. but the mass devastation to your immune and nervous system could have made you ripe for morgellons disease. however, your boyfriend saw the spider too, so i think could very well have morgellons disease, because crystal meth burns out the nervous sytem the body system and the immune system, so you may have unknowingly opened pandoras box. i know it is the WORST drug to do if do indeed have this disease. you will aslo DIE ALOT SOONER IF DECIDE TO CONTINUE TO USE METH. do you have the specks and fibers too? i know how devastating and addictive this substance can be, and it ages people years ahead of their time. i hope if not stopped you can stop. meth is the WORST drug can do if do have morgellons disease, the only illegal drug which is helpful for this disease (although i am no advocate) is marijuanna . i imagine you have seen this site, but if not might find it interesting : http://www.facesofmeth.us/main.htm here is a video shows the devastaion of the drug: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L65TR9IwlR8 . with all it does to the immune sytem it becomes very weak. here a a link to the treatment steps we use to get relief: https://morgellonstreatmentsteps.com/ . hope these steps help you and you get relief and healing pretty soon, YOU ARE WORTH IT. we DO care (LC).

[Lizette45]

Welcome Monika,

I am glad you found this site. Since we are all suffering with this to a different degree-we beleive you and know that you are not crazy! Just do the protocals as they will help alot and I agree with LC-please stop the Meth if you are still on it-we don't want you to lose your life or make things worse. Know that you are just as important as anyone else and that Christ Loves You!

[Franky]

Monika you will find some help and great info here. Sadly in some circles meth usage and morgellons have been lumped together wrongly. Unfortunately they share some similar symptoms. Before you even think of treating morgellons if you in fact have it, you must get off the meth!

You will get no where until you get off the meth. Do you have any other symptoms?

[carla]

Monika, Theres lots you can do to get better. I ve had the most improvement since i started taking supplements.
Please stop taking that evil crap though,for your childrens sake if nothing else .
carla x
heres a link to a good site for treatments

http://www.morgellons-research.org/

[Kritters]

You're a very good writer Monika, I hope to God you are just injecting your story to discredit people who really suffering from this hideous disease to associate it with meth and are not really suffering yourself.

sorry, just a hunch.

Kritters

[ModestoMorgie]

Well, Kritters i must say that your hunch could'nt be MORE further off the mark....I am a bit surprised that you would think that just because i stated that i was using meth at the onset of this disease that means that i am trying to discredit Morgellons and the rest of the people who suffer from it....I am a little incensed about your remark, being that i am a sufferer of this disease and I am a bit put off by your attempt to discredit Me...just because I used meth does not mean that I am a wacked out idiot or a conspiricacy theorist I happen to be pretty intelligent and down to earth person despite some of my bad choices and im in no way shape or form a disinformation specialist...i cannot stand those liars and I resent that you even associated me with them.. but i thank the others for welcoming me....In my case, it is not Meth OR Morgs, it was Both, truth be told... the chemicals that were used to make the meth may have been what allowed this to happen to me in the first place...you know that since there are tougher restrictions in getting the chemicals to make Meth the cookers have resorted to using other substances which contain the ingredient they are looking for in them...for instance engine coolant , or fertilizer, paint thinner and they try to extract the one ingredient they need red phosphorus, lye, etc out of it...and the most cooks are not einsteins....and they do not use top of the line lab equip...so I'm willing to bet that there is a little Agrobacterium or whatever else is in fertilizer or some Propaphelenatolanoxanal No. 3 ( I just made that up ) in with it too...who knows they also were spraying for West Nile around the time i got this too...and I had leaky pipes...so who knows...

To answer the question do i have other symptoms ? Yes i do everyday i have the crawling, fiberballs that fly off of me or white hairs or black hairs or red fibers...as well as blue, purple , one time i had a shocking Orange fiber ball...i get the tobacco like stuff black specks , little twigs, stuff that looks like grass, brownish gel stuff that hardens, crumbs , sand like crap, sometimes on bad days i ll get a small cuts and stuff comes out ,,,i get the crap building up under my nails , the clear fibers or whatever that have sewn themselves from my hairline into my jaw and face, and knitted themselves into my eybrowns and eyelashes are not all my own and the crap gets into myeyes and nose and mouth gumline i can massage my gums and morg granules shoot out of there too,,,, some days are pretty quiet and some days it really goes wild. As for the Meth I am quitting...because It no longer serves any purpose and the energy it once gave me, it now gives my morgs which really kick up in high gear on the stuff...and when I dont use it mellows out unless i am about to start my period or its a full moon....So to Hell with that ****!!! I know meth is such a terrible drug...all I can say for myself is that I became addicted to it so even though I was no longer having good times with the drug, I just kept doing it and really didnt know why i was doing it....but now, with the way it revs up my morg machine to the point it can get unbearable...I fear the other health issues it can cause and i know of too many people whos hearts just failed because they enlarged to the size of a small football because of smoking meth....Gawd...thats just such a waste...not like my life is so bright and fullfillling now that this disease has taken away the life i used to know...I was such a people person, and used to be so sure of myself ...now i cut my hair off which makes me feel insecure about my looks...and i have sores on my back and my skin is ugly and what i hate most is worrying that something gross will fly onto my boyfriend when we get close or make love i can never relax anymore...Im always worrying so much that i cant even enjoy my relationship like i used to...but I thank God for my guy Jay...he has stood by me and always trys his hardest to reassure me that i am the love of his life and that he isnt going anywhere...hes great...If not for him, i think I would have killed myself, as low as i felt at times...

But I refuse to let this crap do me in...I am going to hang in there...and do what i can to make it thru this the first thing Being to stop poisioning myself with the dope...and another is to start a regimin of good things to put into my body instead and work on getting my life back into some kind of order and direction again...I just know that there is an end to this in sight...very soon we will be able to have NORMAL back again and this all will be a distant memory.... and you know I just thank God that I got this crap now while there are doctors who are going to get to the bottom of this and not 5 or more years ago when there was no one to turn to and all the doctors told you that you were crazy...sure, there are still doctors that are doing that to people but they are just ignorant,,,which is why i have not went to a doctor about this yet....I will go to Dr. Staniger when she comes up with the cure for this ...until then I will do my own treatment...thats the only way to get quality care anyways right God Bless you all Monika

[carla]

Hi monica , We've had people do things like what Kritters suggested so don't take it personally.Shes one of the nicest people you could know really.Aren't you Kritters
You do need to get off the meths asap.Is there any help you can get to do this.
If your boyfreind was going to catch it he probably would of by now.Once you get on the treatments you will be more confident about this.
I was a people person too so i know how you feel there.
Get started now with the salt baths,stay away from the meths and things will get better.Like you said theres a cure coming soon.
carla xxx

[Kritters]

Yeah, Monika (and Carls..and thanks Carls) I was a people person also....and you can see what happened!

Seriously, sorry to have incensed you. What you wrote just now makes your post (IMO anyway) more 'real'. You certainly seem to have ALL of the symptoms combined.

Your boyfriend sounds great and I'm happy for you. Mine is standing by me also, although it seems SO FAR anyway that I just have an ordinary, run of the mill parasite or two and possibley a few fungi joining the party. Mine could be the early stages of what you and others have now, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

In any case WELCOME to this forum. I hope you find solace here.

Kritters