How do you deal with the non-believers in your life?

[maryok]

I haven't been able to get this off my mind since I read a bunch of posts regarding disbelieving spouses. Was wondering if it might be helpful to share ideas/strategies for dealing with the doubters in our lives? Not to say we should (or could) try to convince them, but how are people dealing with the added frustration and stress?

Here's how my family became believers (although I do not recommend it!). I passed out and had to go to the ER a few months ago. While I was sitting in a wheel chair waiting for a head x-ray, I looked down and noticed a generous amount of fibers, black specks et had collected in the lap of my hospital gown. I calmly invited family members to come over and meet my "friends." That did it -- they were pretty aghast. But I still need to watch what I say b/c sometimes comments slip, like about brain fog, and I hear "How do you know that for sure? Has a doctor proven that?" Argh............

[Franky]

Mary I personally felt this was one of the worse aspects of having morgellons! The feelings of isolation and confusion so many feel because of lack of support of loved ones, friends and the medical community. In my case I have always been open minded and willing to give everyone there moment if needed. When my friend first approached me with this "story of his" it was a more than a bit to chew, but I listened. When I got through the haze of his story we finally sat down and just started to do tons of research and have never stopped.

Here is the key in my opinion. Initially he spoke to all his family first of course and they all thought he had gone crazy after a while. I then reproached them in a more calm and down to earth way. I basically explained it was a disease just like any other disease that people were still working on to categorize. People are always going to have stories ideas to express and that's fine. But I think initially its imperative to approach this in a very down to earth attitude. Basically I have a disease here are the facts that we know of now and let them take it from there. Something to ponder I hope.

[linnysue]

Franky, I've been fortunate enough to have friends treat me with the same respect you treated your friend with. It also helps to know whom you can confide in and whom to stay away from. I've been VERY selective in whom I share this with, and it hasn't been all that many. I haven't tried to prove anything to anyone. My general doctor still doesn't know that I'm dealing with Morgellons. All of my close friends know I've been dealing with something. I just recently told them that I thought it could be Morgellons. I even have friends who came to that conclusion on their own when they heard a radio show about it. They believe me and know I wouldn't just be making this up.

Mary, I agree, you just have to be discreet in what you say regarding symptoms, especially with some of the bizarre ones!
I hope and pray you have all the support and understanding you need while going through this challenging time.

[Franky]

Think about this for a moment folks. With everything you read here and some of the over the top stuff on other sites. If you were on the flip side, what would you think? If your truthful with yourself many would not believe. I always keep that in mind with dealing with other people. I try to view things from both sides. I find it gives me a better overall view to base my feelings on. I hope I dont sound like a ***, just my 2 cents.

[Brenda]

the only ones who DON'T doubt me are the ones who know they have it. My long-time (6 yrs) boyfriend and my oldest son. any one else that i've shared this with felt that it's my imagination or that i am delusional when it comes to "my bugs". those that finally became convinced that i had something or that i wasn't going to admit to NOT havin somethin wanted nothin more to do with me. i was even evicted from my cousin's home where i was stayin. my youngest son, after i explained that even as a child i didn't have an imagination, stated that he didn't think "my bugs" were imaginary, he thought they are delusions. my boyfriend's family just pretend they were never told i've not told anyone else @ all because it just isn't well received. so there's not really been any "dealing" with non-believers in my life. i just thank God that i don't have to live with someone that totally doesn't believe and is tired of having to live with someone with this disease. it is an all-consuming disease, physically, emotionally, and psychologically, and there's no pretending it ain't there. to have someone pull against your efforts to overcome it would be horrible

[Brenda]

the only ones who DON'T doubt me are the ones who know they have it. My long-time (6 yrs) boyfriend and my oldest son. any one else that i've shared this with felt that it's my imagination or that i am delusional when it comes to "my bugs". those that finally became convinced that i had something or that i wasn't going to admit to NOT havin somethin wanted nothin more to do with me. i was even evicted from my cousin's home where i was stayin. my youngest son, after i explained that even as a child i didn't have an imagination, stated that he didn't think "my bugs" were imaginary, he thought they are delusions. my boyfriend's family just pretend they were never told i've not told anyone else @ all because it just isn't well received. so there's not really been any "dealing" with non-believers in my life. i just thank God that i don't have to live with someone that totally doesn't believe and is tired of having to live with someone with this disease. it is an all-consuming disease, physically, emotionally, and psychologically, and there's no pretending it ain't there. to have someone pull against your efforts to overcome it would be horrible

[maryok]

Hey bj ... totally agree how lucky I am that I don't have to live with someone who's not a believer. The reason I originally asked this question is that although people in my family believe that I have this, (and have been SO great, understanding and supportive) they are also SO dependent on doctor's "official" confirmations. So when I see them and they ask me how I am, I feel like I have to censor everything I say. And I don't really have anything else to talk about b/c I'm in a total fatigue stage, so it's basically consuming my entire life right now.

Don't know about you guys, but I don't even try to talk to my friends these days ... when they ask me to explain what this disease is about, I tell them it's kind of hard to explain and the best thing to do is google it. That way, it spares me from having to hear their skepticism about how weird this really is.

So basically, when I see my siblings, I just try to keep the conversation about what's going on in their lives. Still have to figure out how to respond when they ask they inevitable "how are you feeling." At least I'm lucky -- and very grateful -- that they're there for me.

[maryok]

Hey bj ... totally agree how lucky I am that I don't have to live with someone who's not a believer. The reason I originally asked this question is that although people in my family believe that I have this, (and have been SO great, understanding and supportive) they are also SO dependent on doctor's "official" confirmations. So when I see them and they ask me how I am, I feel like I have to censor everything I say. And I don't really have anything else to talk about b/c I'm in a total fatigue stage, so it's basically consuming my entire life right now.

Don't know about you guys, but I don't even try to talk to my friends these days ... when they ask me to explain what this disease is about, I tell them it's kind of hard to explain and the best thing to do is google it. That way, it spares me from having to hear their skepticism about how weird this really is.

So basically, when I see my siblings, I just try to keep the conversation about what's going on in their lives. Still have to figure out how to respond when they ask they inevitable "how are you feeling." At least I'm lucky -- and very grateful -- that they're there for me.

[Brenda]

maryok.......i really don't have any friends anymore. just relatives, not very close ones at that. and nobody has ever asked me to explain any of it (thank you, God) cuz i read some of what i've written and no wonder they think i'm more than just a bi-polar, OCD'd, post-traumatic syndromed, full blown menopausal female with free floating anxiety brenda

[Brenda]

maryok.......i really don't have any friends anymore. just relatives, not very close ones at that. and nobody has ever asked me to explain any of it (thank you, God) cuz i read some of what i've written and no wonder they think i'm more than just a bi-polar, OCD'd, post-traumatic syndromed, full blown menopausal female with free floating anxiety brenda