The Miracle of Toilet Paper

[jonsi]

The Miracle of Toilet Paper

Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror complaining to my
husband that my breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. 'If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between them for a few seconds.'

Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts. 'How long will this take?' I asked. 'They will grow larger over a period of years,' my husband replies.

I stopped. 'Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?''

Without missing a beat he says, 'Worked for your butt, didn't it?'

He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy, he may even walk again, although he will probably continue to take his meals through a straw.
Stupid, stupid man!

~jonsi

[Natalie]

Miss Jonsi, you are a hoot! Just what I needed, a good laugh! You are such a comedian, me too, gets me through this weird life. Have a good day!

[niecy]

Hey Jonsi, I told this to my family and they are still laughing........the females anyway!!

Niecy
XOXOXO

[Kritters]

Jonsi,

You think you have problems...........

I hate it when people forward bogus warnings, and I have even done it
myself a couple times unintentionally...but this one is real, and it's
important. So please send this warning to everyone on your e- mail
list..

If someone comes to your front door saying they are checking for ticks
due to the warm weather and asks you to take your clothes off and dance
around with your arms up, DO NOT DO IT!! THIS IS A SCAM!! They only
want to see you naked.

I wish I'd gotten this yesterday. I feel so stupid.

Kritters ;-)

[jonsi]

hahahaha Kritters!

Thanks for the warning! ~jonsi

[Frankybme]

Thanks Guys for the Chuckles! Now I have to clean my keyboard of the coffee.

[Kritters]

love you Franky
xoxo
Kritts

[Overwhelmed]

So this rope walks into a bar, jumps up to the bar and asks for a beer... the bartenter turns around points to a sign, "we don't serve ropes". So, sad and thirsty the rope leaves. He walks out back and thinks of an idea... so he starts jumping aroung, running into the sides of the building, rolling on the ground, you get the picture... he goes back to the bar, slides into the bar stool and asks for a rum and coke... the bartenter says, "hey aren't you that rope who was just in here?" The rope says, "I'm aFRAID KNOT". Take care everyone, we all need a laugh sometime.

[jonsi]

That's all,
~jonsi

[tcmgpt13]

How many morgellons patients does it take to change the role of toilet paper?

We don't know--it's never happened.

(slightly changed from the original of : How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper etc.)